Lacking with my virtues....

Ok so I've come to the conclusion that I don't
have enough patience to do this.  
These kids are driving me nuts.

Oh but wait, as I write this, Norah is SLEEPING
and Ava is at SCHOOL and suddenly I feel fine,
so there's that...

But lets back up to this morning.  

My alarm (Norah yelling) woke me up before I 
was ready, just like every day.

She was thrilled to see me, but had no patience
for the fact that I didn't have pants on and wanted 
to go find some...

She wanted to play on the dead phone she found
nestled under the ottoman, she didn't like the 
answer I gave her about it needing to be charged.

She screamed & yelled with no end in sight, she 
ran down the hall to yell at her Dad about all the 
injustices going on in the living room.

She noticed the door to Ava's room closed and 
decided she needed in there to play.  

I explained to her that Ava was sleeping & that 
we could play in there later, 
that didn't go over well.  

I distracted her with food, we headed into the 
kitchen where she started demanding "CRACKERS!"
She mentioned them several times & I countered 
with "Yogurt or Oatmeal?" She chose "Nemo" 
which means oatmeal, and as I reached for it she 
screamed "YOGURT!!" OK then, I grabbed the 
yogurt and she looks somewhat pleased then informs
me she would rather have chicken nuggets.  
Yes, for breakfast.  

I walked out, with the yogurt, and she followed.  Yay.

We got through that and I knew that her head 
would spin if she didn't eat more soon so I sliced up
an apple.  She paid zero attention to the apple until 
I accidentally ate it all then she FREAKED out
that the apple was GONE!!!  

Back with more apples, she ate the parts she likes,
leaving substantial apple meat & skin behind (I'm
not a huge fan of wasting food, Ava is much more
efficient with her apples, thankfully).

She got irrationally upset about who-remembers-
what next and I finally decided to throw her in the 
shower with me.  She was happy happy until I 
washed her hair, or more accurately, until I decided
to RINSE her hair, that didn't go over well AT ALL.

I got her dried off & dressed somewhat un-eventfully
she only complained when I combed her hair, she 
has a very sensitive head, combing or brushing is 
never OK.

She goes to the fridge next begging for something,
she never knows WHAT that is exactly until you 
open the fridge, I think she started thinking about
cheese but settled on eggs when she saw them.

I made her cheesy eggs, since she usually eats them 
pretty well.  She had a hard time waiting while they 
cooked for 1.5 minutes.  And a hard time waiting 
while they cooled for another 45 seconds.  

It's rough being 2 years old.  

I felt like giving her those eggs was buying me a 
moments peace, yet Ava needed some maintenance
too, next thing I knew I heard the crash of Norah's
bowl hitting the floor.  Eggs everywhere.  

Huge grin on Norah's face.  

Even though we've gone over this 1 million times. 
Or maybe because we had.  Who knows.

I still felt somewhat hopeful that she had actually 
eaten some of the eggs and maybe she could find 
happiness in a full tummy but as she insisted on 
getting down I picked her up and found the rest of 
the eggs squished into her clothes, her freshly 
washed hair, and every nook & pocket of her highchair. 

I skillfully lifted her up and tried to brush the eggs 
off of her into the highchair with out getting more 
on the floor I had just cleaned.  

No such luck.  

I then set her on the floor realizing that the rest of 
the eggs she tucked away UNDER her shirt were
falling out everywhere.  She even had them stuck 
to the bottom of her feet, ugh.

As I'm sweeping up the eggs everywhere, Norah is
back at the fridge begging for food.  Never mind
the wasted eggs.  

The clock reads 10am.

This story could go on and on and on and on but 
I think you get where I'm going with this.   

I really want to be a good mom!!  I do.  I'm just 
not sure I have the patience for it.  So KNOWING
that, now what?

How does one work on their patience?  
Today I chose to leave the house.  
It's usually my best bet. 

They were driving me nuts so I took them
and fed them things I would never eat and 
I don't even care.  I love our rare $3 lunch,
cheeseburgers for them and an ice tea for me.  

It bought me time & saved me from killing 
them, win, win.  Right??

Clearly I need suggestions on how to 
survive this stage Norah is in? I don't want
to be the mom that yells, yells, yells.  I want to
be so patient & loving & understanding & 
more patient.  

But I'm not.

But I really do want to be!  
Please help!!
I'd love your suggestions!


Erik said…
You watched me go through it with Cole. It's irrationally hard with that kind of kid. I have no advice. Resign yourself that it will suck, set your jaw, and get ready to bear it out for four more years. Also, drinking helps. And make sure you have one thing that is just for you, like running. Also, it gets better every year. Knowing that helps too. Mostly alcohol helps.
Sarah said…
I agree, alcohol. No, really I know it's mostly an age thing, she will grow out of it. And having "one thing, like running" is great advice. I have gotten so much out of just being able to step away for a minute and put it all back in perspective. And alcohol. Yes. :)
guzzi guy said…
You are a great mom and you have a 2 year-old. I sense that there are ups and downs here and you are documenting how *down* things can get. Patience is something I think we *all* can use more of, but is also something very hard to find. I just want you to know that you are doing the best you can and are doing a great job.
Sarah said…
Thanks Dad! That is very sweet!! Love you!

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